Flirting is so important to your relationship, whether its your old relationship you want to rekindle or a new one you want to ignite, flirting is where its at. And I show you how to rekindle a relationship using flirting as way to get back into your ex’s life.
The problem is, you may think you can do this and be over confident due to previous encounters with old partners. you really need to be fully informed on how to flirt correctly, otherwise you could easily blow it with odd messages that will destroy your chances.
Flirting is very important but why?
The basic facts are, it is how we find a mate for breeding purposes, which isn’t a great chat up line but it is the bare facts. It is how we communicate with a possible mate, this can and is done through verbal communication and often more importantly non verbal communication. It shows our mate, the amount of interest we have.
OK, so here is the list of important things you need to remember to help you rekindle your relationship
1. Physical appearance – don’t get this wrong
This is number one for a good reason, if you look bad, unkempt, like you don’t care, you are out of the game. So take care, wear a clean shirt and wash!!! Its all about the effort you have made, there probably is a scale here, 0 effort = 0 chance of progressing past the first stage. Your potential mate really wants to know and see you have made a big effort to look good. They want to see your beauty not your beast. You simply cannot flirt while looking bad, it destroys any chemistry you may have created before you are seen.
Your clothing is crucial here, and will help set the scene, and is another important point. You have to be comfortable and look confident, so it can’t be too comfortable. You have to look and feel cool and your clothing must compliment your own style and it is key to be confident as you have a lot of flirting to do. So you don’t want your clothing to get in the way…
2. The unwritten language of the body
OK so body language speaks volumes and is often more important than what you say and key to use the right body language when you do speak. Non verbal mistakes are often difficult to recover from. Be very aware of how you look to your ex. They will be taking in every movement, so arm folding is a no-no, it looks like you are putting a barrier up and are not interested. Never fold your arms, instead use your hands and arms to convey what you are saying without going over the top and looking like a mime artist.
Like in the wild, when 2 potential mates are communicating, they both end up mirroring each others movements, this can be very subtle but noticeable. If you pick up on this, it is a good sign as it shows interest.
3. Maintain eye Contact
Another really important point, if done correctly it again shows interest and your ex will be impressed but if done wrong it can look a little weird. Try and hold eye contact for up to 5 seconds at a time, much longer and you are now staring.
To take this to another level, try looking at each eye in turn and then look at their mouth especially when they are talking. If you get this right or even nearly right, it gives great signals of interest and you are only there for them and nothing else.
You must smile, a smile can be a beautiful thing and a sure fire winner, you just have to do it. It makes the person receiving the smile feel wanted and it shows you are interested in what they are saying. So try and smile naturally and not in a weird way, keep it a simple little smile, try and hold a little back.
5. Are they interested, look for signs
This is important, but you can’t just ask them, you are going to have to read the signs.. You will have to be cool and work out the signs, here are some things to look out for that will show you it is going well.
• They follow the way you move and smile or even laugh at your humor.
• When you speak, they seem interested
• Eye contact is held and they smile
• Physical contact is made !!!
• Open body language
And here are some signs it isn’t going well.
• If they look elsewhere and are not really engaged
• Looking at their watch
• They have a friend turn up to help them or even get them out of there!!
• Any back turning is bad while you are talking, worse, they actually walk away
• Their interest is not in you but with people around you
If any of these occur, don’t worry, flirting is probably over at this stage, don’t carry on flirting, just smile and carry on, you haven’t lost the war, maybe this battle. So try and talk to someone else and not look at your ex, be nice and calm. They may be playing a game, the important thing is to give yourself another chance on another day.
6. Flattery and compliments
Do not give a compliment if you don’t mean it, it has to be how you feel, a fake compliment is not cool and you will look dumb. A good compliment is to compliment their appearance, their dress, hair, smile. And any changes you may notice, that is always a great compliment as it shows you have noted it.
And never, never compliment anything unless you truly believe it does look good, or you will be found out!!
7. Keep it interesting, don’t be boring
OK, another big one, you know yourself if you were a little tedious or even dare I say boring before and your ex will know too. You have to be enticing, interesting, someone they want to be with, not that old bore you used to be. So you have to up-sell, no negativity, no unhappy stories, just positive vibes, you are moving forward, the new you!! With a little mystery, again less is more, don’t tell them everything.
And importantly, don’t just nod, listen and ask questions about what they are saying and try and have a view, this will show you not only listened but you were interested.
8. Retain a little mystery, you can’t be over keen
If things go well, be cool and don’t dive straight back into the relationship, retain a little mystery. You will then be on their mind after you leave each other. If they come away thinking its the old you, then that is not what you want as there must have been something wrong with the old you?
Make them want to see you again and don’t agree to everything or don’t agree to the next date without checking, be cool, a little mystery around your life and interests. But not too cool, you need follow a fine line between being cool and still interested.
9. Be the real you
Be yourself, as that’s what your ex in the first place, fell in love with. Be the real you, a little different is good but not completely different.
10. Flirting takes practice
Don’t worry if you aren’t the world’s greatest flirt first time or second time, it does take practice. Just remember what you didn’t do as well as you could or if you forgot one of the tips. Hopefully you will get another chance and if your ex sees you improving, that will definitely help you.
So that is the 10 tips, all very important. I know it isn’t easy as flirting skills if not used get forgotten. But if you really want your ex back, you are going to have to get out there and be confident.